"Mom, Charlotte's putting sunscreen on" One little sentence that changes your day. That's what my son yelled to me through the bathroom door as I was taking a minute for "Mommy time".
"Awesome" I think as I prepare myself for what I'm about to walk into. Boy, was I unprepared.
When I open the door I am greeted with a "pleasant" smell of garlic. What? She is in fact covered with sunscreen. Wait...thats not sunscreen ::sniff, sniff:: that is hummus. Great. Did I mention I hate hummus?
"Charlotte put sunscreen on to go into the pool! She is silly" says my 3 year old.
"Ummmmm....unless she's swimming in a pool of pitas she's not going anywhere."
I immediately grab the wet wipes since they are the closest thing--and I am NOT picking her up--and start scraping off the hummus. Yes, it is caked on so I must scrape. My kids are SOOOOOO never eating hummus again for lunch. Let's just say, I've cleaned hummus out of places hummus should never be--and when I say that I really just mean in between toes--all while violently gagging because, as I mentioned earlier, I hate hummus.
Rewind, 2 hours. I'm walking to the kitchen to get something to drink and look over to see my 3 year old using the bathroom. Okay, nothing wrong with that. Wait. Why is his pee going in the opposite direction from the toilet? So I walk up to him and stand there watching him pee not only on our wall, but also across our entire shower curtain. He cannot be serious right now. When he finally noticed me, no words needed to be said. Straight to his room he went. I played the mother role very well for about 10 minutes and then I lost it when he stopped taking it seriously and told me he was washing the shower curtain.
These are the things I have to deal with as a mother of a 2 and 3 year old. I'm still not used to it. Why did they think these were good ideas? lol. The world may never know. Kids...